I will always be unhappy
Unhappy? You can tell by these 12 signs (and what you can do about it!)
Are you sad? Or do you not even know exactly whether it is you or not?
In this article, you will find 12 clear signs that you are unhappy. Read these through and see how many of them apply to you. This will help you find out what exactly is causing your unhappiness and where you can start.
Then you will find out exactly what you can do now to live happier. I'll also tell you what factors science has identified for a happy life.
12 clear signs that you are unhappy
Do you know the following points? Then it could be that you are unhappy and that you haven't really noticed it yet.
1. You brood too much
Do you often just keep thinking? Are your thoughts circling wildly in your head and yet you cannot come to a solution? Are you just brooding too much?
To be constantly in the carousel of thoughts definitely makes you unhappy. Because it costs strength and energy and does not provide a solution.
And that's exactly what is mean about brooding: the mind tells you that by brooding you will find a solution and that this will bring relief. But just the opposite is the case: Brooding only leads to more brooding.
If you are caught in this trap, here's what you can do to escape it:
Do as many things as you can to get relief. So the next time you're just in your head and your thoughts are jumping back and forth, do something that is good for you. For example, going for a walk, doing yoga, going to the sauna, meditating or anything else that gets you out of your head and into your body.
Because the brooding stops when you start to notice your feelings. You can find out more about this in this video:
2. You think mostly negatively
Will the weather be bad again this weekend? Is there not enough money for the next vacation? Does your boss only call again anyway because he wants to give you an unpleasant task? Does the neighbor only turn on the leaf blower now because he wants to annoy you with it?
How you look at the world has a huge impact on how you feel. When you see only the bad in everything, it's no wonder you are unhappy. Your inner attitude has a great influence on how you feel.
So if you are used to seeing the negatives in many cases, you could start by consciously putting your focus on the positive things. In every situation consider: What is good about it?
And then focus on the answer. It is your decision what to focus on.
You can read more about this here: Positive thoughts - this is how you use them correctly!
3. You are unhappy at work
Are you already looking forward to Monday on Sunday evening? Do you get up in the morning and can't wait to start work? Do you like your job?
Then, of course, that can go a long way in making you unhappy.
If so, there are exactly three things you can do:
You can try to change something within the job, for example by getting a transfer internally or by asking if you can work with other colleagues.
If that doesn't work, you can work on your attitude. Is the job really that bad? Or are there also aspects that you like? What are you doing all this for?
You may find a way to make friends with your work by giving it a conscious thought.
And if that doesn't work either, you still have the option of looking for a new job. It is your life and your responsibility and you can decide how you want to use it.
4. You are unhappy in the relationship
Or is your relationship the cause of your unhappiness? Are you unhappy in marriage?
The same applies here: it is your life and no one can force you to live it according to their ideas. You decide who you spend your time with.
Perhaps a clarifying conversation with your partner will help. Because unspoken accusations and unresolved conflicts create an uncomfortable distance.
Take the initiative and decide which direction you want your relationship to take in the future.
5. You have no purpose in life
Does your life feel empty and pointless? Do you just not know what this is all about? Do you have no goals and you don't know where your journey should go? Don't you have any meaning in life
Then it's no wonder if you're unhappy.
You make sense of yourself when you begin to consciously take responsibility. And what you take on this responsibility for, you can choose yourself.
Try yourself out, test a lot and constantly make new experiences to find out what gives you pleasure. Give meaning to your life by yourself.
You can read more about the meaning of life here: The meaning of life - that's it!
6. You are often alone and feel lonely
Do you lack social contacts? Are you often alone Or do you even feel lonely when you are in groups?
We humans are social beings and depend on one another. And relationships with other people are an important part of a happy life. So if you want to be happy, start leaving your loneliness behind.
You can find out exactly how you can do this in this video:
7. You are afraid of the future and worry a lot
Do you have many worries about the future? Do you often think about what can go wrong, what problems there are and what could be missing in the future?
Worrying about the future is nothing but a pipe dream. Because at the moment when you worry about the future, it has not yet occurred and is therefore not real.
The same applies here: rethink. Start focusing on positive aspects and abundance in life. Just what feels good.
You can also find out here how to stop worrying: 4 ways to get rid of your worries
8. You often think about the past
While worries are negative thoughts about the future, it is also possible to dwell in the past a lot. And that definitely makes you unhappy.
There's nothing wrong with indulging in old memories, but at a certain point it becomes unhealthy.
Because if you only live in the past, you miss the here and now.
Make peace with your past.
You can find a very good technique for this here: Your inner child - heal old injuries and develop love for yourself
9. You constantly compare yourself to others
Comparing yourself to others is a guarantee of unhappiness. Because other people are different from you. They have different abilities, they have lived a different life, they have different experiences. And when you compare yourself to them, you only ever see what is missing. That makes you unhappy.
Stop comparing yourself to others. Just look at what you are doing. The only important thing is where you come from and where you want to go. And of course you can use others as a source of inspiration, but you shouldn't make the mistake of comparing yourself to them.
10. You care too much what others think of you
If you care too much about what others think of you, that won't help you be happy either. Because then you are only in your head again and reproach yourself.
Because if you often think about how you might have affected others in certain situations or how you should have acted differently, you are only criticizing yourself and trying to please others.
You are then not with yourself, but only with others. And that makes you unhappy.
Instead, concentrate on yourself, your desires and needs and on what gives you joy in life.
In this video you get even more tips:
11. You have no drive and you find it difficult to motivate yourself
If you have a hard time getting up and going for things, it can be a sign that you are unhappy. This is then a vicious circle: you are unhappy because you have no drive and you have no drive because you are unhappy.
It is important to break out of this circle. And you do that by starting to do. It's best to start with a class or something else that you can do on a regular basis. It is important that you stay tuned.
Because the more you get into action, the less you are in your head and the more drive you build up.
In this article you will learn more about: Overcoming listlessness - in 5 steps to an eventful life
12. You think a lot about things that you don't have and are therefore in shortage
Thinking in lack of course also contributes to unhappiness. Because if you keep thinking about what you don't have and what you are missing, it doesn't feel good.
And above all, it doesn't change anything in your situation!
Rather focus on what you already have, be grateful and live a life in abundance.
With these 4 concrete steps you will be happy
In the above points you have already received instructions on what you can do to lead a happier life.
Furthermore, you can orient yourself on the following four points in order to bring more happiness into your life overall.
1. Define exactly in which area of life you are unhappy with what
Take another look at the areas of life in which your unhappiness originated. Is it your finances, your job, your relationship, your social contacts, your health, your leisure activities or another area of life that has a negative impact on your life?
Write down each area of life on a piece of paper and write down what you are satisfied with and what you are dissatisfied with in this area of life. This will help you identify the sources of your unhappiness.
2. Set goals and start acting
The second step is now to start with these sources. Think carefully about what you would like to change in the individual areas of life and what you have to do to achieve this.
So set yourself very specific goals and start realizing them immediately.
If you need some goal setting guidance, check out the following article: 42 Questions That Will Change Your Life
3. Take back the power over your life
Then it is still important that you leave the victim role and take back power over your life. You do this by accepting that all of your choices so far have brought you exactly where you are now.
Of course, there can be hard strokes of fate that throw you back again and again, but the question is still: How do you deal with it?
In the end, it is always your decisions that determine what your future will be.
And that's why you make a conscious decision to take responsibility for your life and make your decisions for the future consciously. If you want to live happier, start making this wish your own.
4. Change your thinking
This also includes leaving negative ways of thinking, worries about the future and unnecessary brooding behind you, concentrating on the positive, becoming the creator of your life and being happy in the here and now.
Check out the following video for more tips on how to think positively:
What makes you happy? - That's what science says about it
Science has found nine things that are proven to make you happy. I have summarized what these are exactly in the following article: These 9 things make you happy!
In the end, it should be noted that life is not always fair and one cannot choose everything. And that is precisely why it is important to take responsibility for what is within your own sphere of influence. Because I firmly believe: everyone is the maker of their own happiness!
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